Happy Anniversary, Josh McDaniels!

lol later doods

lol later doods

Yes, you mindless sack, it’s your anniversary. Welcome to it. We’ve got some cupcakes over there, some champagne to celebrate. You don’t get to have any, because you are a fucking failure. A failure as a head coach, a failure as a person.

You’re a fucking doucheburger.

It was two years ago today that you were kicked to the fucking curb. Following the trading of a franchise quarterback, a franchise receiver, a very popular and allegedly hard-working scrappy runner, you replaced all of them with players who were not better, not close to better, in fact much worse. Then, in a move that will be remembered as the final nail in your coffin, you managed to completely shit the bed by taping a 49ers practice in London, kicking off a scandal that embarrassed the team, its owner, and its fans.

Nevermind that the team was a consistent threat to win the division every year prior to your arrival. Nevermind that the worst season in the last three decades came on your watch.

John Elway had to save us yet again from a fate worse than death when he sat in the EVP chair and started making decisions — good decisions — which positively affected the franchise after essentially weathering the storm you brought down upon it.

“Sure,” you say, “but did Elway draft Tim Tebow and Knowshon Moreno and trade a first for Alphonso Smith and give up a fourth for a blocking tight end who was rated as a 7th round prospect?” No, you twat, and that’s exactly the point.

Two years ago, the healing began.

Thank you, John Elway.

In the comments: Where were you the day Kennedy was shot McDaniels was fired?

Today’s a day for much celebration, and not just for shitcanning a terrible coach. No, December 5 has historical significance, for on this day in 1933, Prohibition ended.

See? Good day.

Defending Josh McDaniels (Kinda): One Year Later

Josh McDaniels
You won’t get many arguments that Josh McDaniels’ tenure in Denver was anything but an abysmal mess. But part of being a fan is having to look back and see the entire situation with clear eyes once the dust settles, and various other clichés.

Josh McDaniels dismantled a team thought by many to be “on the brink” of a breakout season, a playoff berth, and perhaps a run at the Super Bowl. He sent numerous starters packing, most notably Jay Cutler, Brandon Marshall, Peyton Hillis and Tony Scheffler.  In return for a lion’s share of draft picks, sufficient to rebuild any team, McDaniels piled on the Bronco faithful with horrific draft day decisions.  Most asinine was his decision to trade his 2010 first round pick (which ultimately turned into the impact safety Earl Thomas) to the Seattle Seahawks to pick Alphonso Smith in the second round of the 2009 draft, who was then traded (after one season!) to the Detroit Lions for one Dan Gronkowski.  Not to be confused with the other more successful Gronkowski (Rob) who just broke the receiving record for touchdowns by a tight end, Dan Gronkowski is unemployed right now. Knowshon Moreno is a complete bust, and the rest of the 2009 class (with the notable exception of defensive end Robert Ayers) doesn’t even play for the Broncos anymore.

Needless to say, McHoodie’s blunders were epic. Not 4-foot powder day epic mind you, but Bernie Bickerstaff epic.

As I sat watching the Broncos pull out yet another improbable victory and listened to the banal chorus of team unity yet again: “putting the whole before the individual”, “believing in one another”, etc., I couldn’t help but think back to McDaniels and the culture he publicly sought for the Denver Broncos.  The talents of the four key players shipped off are immense, but so are the flaws: [Read more…]

From X’s and O’s to Press and Egos: The Evolution of the NFL Head Coach

I don’t think Vince Lombardi, Tom Landry or Bum Phillips ever cared what the press said.

Something tells me that if a player’s ego got too big, George Allen or George Halas would sit him. He wouldn’t have a single person to whom he would have to answer.

But those were the old days. The days when a coach was actually in charge of the players on the team, and not the other way around. This was before the 24 hour news cycle, sports blogs (hey, that’s us!), fans with demands and all the other nonsense that surrounds an NFL team in the modern era. Truth is, I probably wouldn’t trade it for the old days — the modern game is more exciting, more accessible than ever — but it occurred to me last night while watching that awful Rams/Seahawks game that being a coach now is less like being a coach and more like being… something else.

[Read more…]

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