The Bunk’s Top Three Issues for the Occupiers

Time to go 1789 on dat azz...

On Monday the hobo collective known as Occupy Denver sent out a message to its Facebook followers:

I have a quick question for all our followers. What are your top 3 issues from, or for, the occupy movement? And we would love it if you would put them in order of priority too (Put you top priority in #1, Second priority in #2, third in #3) Thank you all so much for being with us, Solidarity..!

Well thank fuck for that. Your correspondent and Magic Sam have only been arguing for months that the Occupiers need to settle on a small set of popular demands; finally, they appear to have extricated their heads from their frozen asses. Maybe this was all part of their soshulist plan, or maybe they took some good advice from a backchannel in the gubmint. Better late than never I guess.

So, your correspondent has taken a crack at it. In each case, my priorities would be addressed by reducing the scope of what the federal government does. I think the Occupiers will not be successful unless they coalesce around issues (maybe just a single issue) on which they have substantive agreement with their right-wing populist counterparts in the Tea Parties. There won’t be any popular reform if the libtards and wingnuts keep yelling past each other, so they might as well join forces.

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